Dear my heart,
After you’ve been around the block a couple of times, you start to draw your standards. You start to figure out what you want and what you need and how to compromise between the two. It takes time and effort and a lot of work, that normally you wouldn’t have done. But you feel it when the person you’re with is worth fighting for, worth trying for… worth feeling for. And you get your heart broken. Because that’s how the story goes. People keep falling in and out of love their entire life. They’re always seeking new ways and new people to fill the void, that empty little black hole in their existence. And filling up that little black hole, it makes all the difference. It gives your life meaning. I mean, let’s face it: a life without love?! A life without that special someone to watch over you and witness as you fulfill your destiny? That’s no life at all!
After you’ve been around the block a couple of times, you start to draw your standards. You start to figure out what you want and what you need and how to compromise between the two. It takes time and effort and a lot of work, that normally you wouldn’t have done. But you feel it when the person you’re with is worth fighting for, worth trying for… worth feeling for. And you get your heart broken. Because that’s how the story goes. People keep falling in and out of love their entire life. They’re always seeking new ways and new people to fill the void, that empty little black hole in their existence. And filling up that little black hole, it makes all the difference. It gives your life meaning. I mean, let’s face it: a life without love?! A life without that special someone to watch over you and witness as you fulfill your destiny? That’s no life at all!
And in the midst of falling in and out of love, there is that one person! That one love that stands out from all the rest. Raising your standards so high that it makes it almost impossible to find anyone else to rise to the occasion, ever!
And even if you were the one to flee this love, this commitment. Even if you were the one who could not handle that much affection and wrap your mind and heart around that much comprehension and devotion. Even if you were the one to break her heart, you still end up heart broken, unfixable.
Along the way of your healing process, you stumble across a new person. You like that person so much that you think “ maybe, just maybe that person will fix my heart”. And you live in that fantasy trying to recreate what you had felt before all the while knowing deep down that there is no way the two can be compared!
The thing is you never brace yourself for the other outcome: the possibility where this new person is not supposed to heal your heart, but where you’re supposed to fix your heart on your own.
You know when someone stands out from the rest. Even if you’ve only been through a couple of relationships. Even if half of them don’t count. Even if you still have 100 lives to live. You know when someone is a turning point in your life. You know when that someone will be the pillar to which everyone else will be compared.
You can tell when you’ve been imprinted by a love so strong and so perfect.
Dear my heart, I am so sorry I had to put you through this. I am so sorry I made all of your next conquests meaningless. I wish you nothing more but to be able to get past through that one day, to be able to feel again through the numbness.
Dear my heart, I am sincerely hoping this is the last time I write you such a letter… twice in a lifetime is quite enough. I hope we never meet again.
Yours sincerely, Destiny.
kim
Amazing.